Thursday, February 17, 2005
i just realised my blog's too happy. everytime i feel real shitty bout something i just clam up and either go think some more bout it for the rest of the week until pool time after cell where i sit with ah neh and tell him all the shit or i turn to God bout it but sometimes im really too ashamed to do that because of how im blardie thinking sometimes. hey i noe there's no condemnation ohkay i just feel real dumb bout askin him to clear my nonsense all the time. what the heck is he. a rubbish dump? not like ive done anyting for him anyways. so yea. i feel happy i feel sad i dunno how to act. i dont even noe how shawn behaves anymore. i stumble on my words while thinking what's the best thing to say and i feel like a fool. i wonder if any of my intelligent frens feel that way. maybe they realise "hey whatever i say sounds real good and intelligent all the time anyway so pple like me." =) hey im real happie for you guys anyway. so maybe that's the only silver lining. HEY MY FRENS ARE HAPPY SO I SHOULD BE TOO YAY. anyway i have a splitting headache and ive got nyp tmr so bye.