Saturday, August 14, 2004
Thank God for every thing. His right hand and His faithful arm have worked salvation for Him. I actually know that I possess talents and good points now which is a huge improvement from last time when i thought i was utterly useless and a mistake for the world to learn from. I dunno. What I've experienced in life so far has been failure after failure, some of i utterly deserve, but i guess what God has blessed me with is a character which doesnt give up. i endure failures cos i'm so used to it and i just dun care and i try and try and try again until i get what i want or until i am satisfied. In studies, in games, in sports I can train to be the best if I absolutely love the thing even though i have no talent in it whatsover and I seem like a failure at first. But what bout love? Try and try and try again? I can and i might for the next 10 years but for the fact that it involves other people and i dun wan any one else to get hurt. God has also instilled a passion in me for the things which i enjoy doing. Pulling out of stuff has always been difficult for me. Something i feel very passionate about is football. Heh i love playing football it gets my mind of stuff it burns my fats and i run and run and run and run like i've never done b4 just because my mind is fixed on one thing. THE BALL. And the feeling of scoring a goal, or your team coming from behind to win. wow. the rush of emotions.. I absoultely adore it. Another thing i'm passionate about i guess is my friends. They are the next thing to football cos they were the ones who played football with me. I can never ever imagine myself disassociating myself with them or leavin them behind me and living a life of myself and fining more new people and then leaving them behind again. Maybe I've done that to some people in the past but i will not now especially not with them... I'll never forget and I miss all of you all the time.. I wanna be all of you till the time i grow old and die. I dunno. that's the amount of heart i put into every thing which i do, or even pple that i love. Is that a good thing? I guess i cant let go sometimes which is not a good thing cos i need to look forward and do things for God's glory. And it hurts pulling myself out of stuff. Ouch. I wanna experience the rush of passion again. Let me out loose on a football pitch please. Now you know why i like alan smith so much.
~ I can do whatever I want. No matter how much it hurts it's my choice and I'll make you happy ~